-I- h-A-te you

David is leaving to go IA and "defend democracy". Yes, I understand that it's necessary. Yes, I understand that I knew this was part of the package, that it was a trade off... I am marrying someone who deploys frequently, he married someone with an unhealthy obsession with facebook. I know. But freakin hell, it seems like he just got back! Why are we now finding out that he'll be leaving again? They gave us all of 2 months notice. Do you know how hard it is to prepare to live as half yourself for a YEAR, in 2 months time? We have soo much to get done. His divorce still isnt finalized, we have a court date set for August 18th, and Im praying we walk out of there with a divorce decrea. I know David and the [X] have been seperated for years now, but Im still not giddy about the idea of getting married just days after his DIVORCE is finalized. I guess its just the "sound" of that, that I dont like. =// I wanted to choke her when I found out they were still "legally married" after we were...well, I WAS, under the impression they had been divorced for 3 years now. In all senses of the word he has been "MINE" for 2 years now, and thats how it will stay, I have no doubt, but I cant help but be irritated by the way things are coming together. I already gave up my big wedding, for a smaller one [which was fine], and now I have been reduced to "just doing it". How we are married isnt as important as the meaning behind it, but...How else do I explain it except its every girls dream....I guess thats the sacrafice of a military wife.
So, not only do we have to put a rush on getting married, we have to put a rush on buying a new car. We planned to buy one early next year and now we have to buy it within the next month. We also need a new laptop so he can take ours with him. David is re-enlisting next week. We have to get his Page 2s, & Power of Attorney in order. We will then have to go get IDs and deal with insurance for the girls and I. Next will be putting base stickers ont the new car, and then getting the RPP set up on our house. AHHH!
After all this is said and done David has brought up the two of us taking a vacation, or honeymoon by that time I guess. We dont know where, or for how long, but gosh doesnt that sound amazzzing?! I really hope we find the time to fit that in our schedule, but in the big picture it is coming in last.
David keeps talking about all the money we will save with him going IA, how much more the paycheck will be, yadda yadda yadda. While all of this is pleseant news, I would trade it all to have this next year with him HOME rather than in a war zone. =((.
Im sure it sounds as though I am rambling. All of these thoughts are still so jumbled in my head. I have every intention of sitting down making a TO DO list that must be completed before he leaves in OCT.!
Ugh, just the sound of OCTOBER makes my stomach turn.
I just got him back. I swear I did. & This is where I stop, before I start to sound like the "anti military wife" and ramble on and on about the Navy and Chain of Command and so on and so forth.
I guess after all is said & done, the title of this Blog could not ring more true than it does at this very moment. =//


I'm both sad and irate all in one.